inxomnia

Book Review: Something Borrowed by Emily Giffin

2012-02-14T04:55:00.000-08:00

I love this cover more than the one I had (the movie cast)!

This is a hard one. Looking back, I can't tell whether I loved the book or not - which in itself is telling. It's definitely not spectacular, however I did manage to get to the end of the book quicker than I expected due to its faster pace.

The characters in the book are probably the sustaining factor. In a sense, you can kind of relate to the characters or spot one of them in your larger social group. You don't have a super perfect hero or a flawless heroine. Frankly speaking, I got annoyed at the characters and that goes to show that the characters were "real" enough to connect with the audience.

In a gist, Rachel the plain Jane has always been outdone by her confident, self absorbed best friend Darcy. On an eventful day, she ends up having an affair with Darcy's fiance, Dex. Dex and Rachel knew each other way back in law school before she introduced him to Darcy, with both seeming to have withheld their true feelings for each other back then. This resurfaces months before Dex's wedding date. Thus, when they realise feelings are involved, they end up having an affair behind Darcy's back. Thrown into the mix is Marcus, Dex's friend, who is interested in Rachel and with whom she shares some convenient kisses with.

This posed some thoughtful dilemmas for me. At some point, it was nice to see Rachel living life on edge a little, not being so spineless and ever-so-succumbing towards Darcy. It was thrilling in a sense (okay, I hope that's not reflective of me or my morals!) when she did the whole dancing between Marcus and Dex. However, it got annoying when the affair consumed her. I don't know whether I'm being naive or that I've learnt something from my own experiences, but it's annoying and repressive once you let someone take over your life to that extent. Maybe it's me, but I fear such a relationship. Because, how do you move on from that? But, it was within Rachel's character to do so. Dex is more complex. He wasn't as 'defined' as the two female protagonists here. He actively pursued the affair with Rachel, but he remained with Darcy and then broke it off with Rachel before realising he should break it off with Darcy instead. Are guys really like this? I don't know and while it added to the plot (well, something had to happen!) ... it made it a little draggy and annoying. I don't know, I was left a little unsatisfied because let's be real, I can't say I fell in love with Dex. I mean, he cheated on his fiance; strung Rachel along and then decided on who he loved. I can't say a man like that attracts me.

What to take out of this? Read or no read? Honestly, I'm sure there are other books out there that will be more worth your time than this book. But it's your choice ultimately. Alternatively, the novel has been made into a film so that's always an option.

Book Review: Rosie Meadow Regrets... by Catherine Alliott

2012-02-12T18:01:00.001-08:00

Finished a book! Yes, I'm awfully proud of myself :D

With its lovely, girly cover of neutrals and a cosy fireplace, it's quite obviously this book was targeted at women. Rosie Meadow Regrets... is a wonderful read, yet it is not the quintessential 'chick lit' novel. It's a bit more sophisticated, thoughtful, well-written and a little less cheesy and straight forward.

We are plunged straight into the meatier stuff, and by this I don't mean gore. Rosie's story begins with her lingering doubts about her marriage and wants to divorce her husband (ugh). Plagued by an incessant mother who harps on about prestige and marrying the wealthy, a sister who is immaculately 'perfect' and an unlucky love life; she married her husband but she never truly loved him. Conveniently, he dies. From there, we witness Rosie settling down by the countryside, living a simple life in 'recovery'. There is no real mourning as such; she's on her journey of self discovery and understanding her life, her choices and who she is.

It is nice to see her bond with the little kids, and her landlord's helpers. It carves a story of friendship in a small town and shows that we don't need an awful lot of flashy friends or a metropolitan lifestyle to be happy. She's content, yet she's still figuring out a lot of things. Like many women, she meets a man who seems convincingly promising, yet turns out to be another rat. Then, true to formula, there is another man. There always is.

But this one is solid, dependable, all the gentleman and is really very likeable. There is no 'sweeping her off her feet'' or sweet summer fling, you kind of just watch their romance happen on a day to day basis. It's a nice change because sometimes all those romantic cliches don't truly capture the essence of love, because those whirlwind romances are fleeting and so very complicated. I'm at a point where I can appreciate the divorcee making peace with herself, with a guy in the background, then being ready for another relationship. Granted I'm not that old myself, but it's a nice sentiment that when we make mistakes in love, it is not the end of the world, and we can still be happy in many other ways.

Towards the end, there was a lot more action with Rosie being under investigation for her husband's convenient demise. A lot of mystery surrounds his death and events are events disrupt Rosie's momentary peace. Admittedly, it was up to this point that I actually read the book 'faster' due to the pace itself. I read the first 2/3 on and off because it was easy to pick up where it left off, because it's a slow leisurely read. Just what I needed to get back into reading.

Verdict: Simple, lighthearted and enjoyable. Great for a pre-sleep read.

Beautiful

2012-02-09T16:56:00.000-08:00

Why You’re Beautiful « Thought Catalog

I don't think we truly seek to recognise the beauty in people very often. A lot of the times, we pinpoint to what aspects of them we like, and then try to implement that in our lives. Sometimes though, a simple phrase such as "You're beautiful" goes a long way. Beautiful is something that reaches one's soul. It's a word more rarely used, yet means so much more. However, I don't entirely agree that someone beautiful doesn't care if others think they are beautiful, that they know that they are beautiful. Yes, there are those beauties. But there are the other beauties who go through life, putting others before themselves, then finding themselves lost. Those people are beautiful because they care, because they are compassionate and because they are strong enough to withstand being second priority. There are a lot of beautiful people in the world, we just aren't acknowledging them.

Completion: DIY Calendar Journal

2012-02-09T10:19:00.000-08:00

Okay, so I had a lot of things to blog about in those post. But all the thoughts are muddled up and running amok. Unsurprising though, it is 5:20am and I have not had a wink of sleep tonight. I stayed up to craft. I guess, I'm determined like that. Or stubborn. I am really quite stubborn, but that's unlikely to change. I admire my stubbornness. I know, it sounds strange to say it like that, and probably not very modest, but come on, I love myself.

Anyways, crazy achievement! I actually completed my DIY Calendar Journal. I am so impressed with myself, in a sense. Admittedly I was supposed to have finished it weeks ago, but who cares? It's done now and it's so goddamn gorgeous. I just want to hug it and be all sugary to it. Yes, that's not normal but we're all created a little different aren't we?

Some random things learnt and experiences that have resulted from my accomplishment:

I actually intended to stamp the dates instead of writing it but since I impulsively changed the size of the cards (smaller), it looked with having such massive dates; I got lazy; stamping 366 cards... Need I say more?
So, I handwrote in lovely black fine tip/felt tip (I forgot the word). I love writing in it though because it makes your handwriting look all scrawly and beautiful and girly. But, um, since I have not written in a while and the last time I have been writing have been geared towards the purpose of writing a lot not beautifully, my handwriting is u-g-l-y-you-ain't-got-no-alibi-you-errrglayyy! Sad but true.
On that note, I find that June, July, August, November particularly nice months for your handwriting. In the sense that they can be written cursively prettily. Random...
I actually wrote August - December in the semi-darkness, with the shadows of a blue-neon night light. Why? Because it was 4:30 in the morning and I kept hearing weird sounds. I didn't want to be nagged to go to bed and I was adamant on completing these beauties 'tonight' so I persisted. You know how people say your vision in the dark gets clearer gradually? Yeah... not when you're writing in black, on white card, with blue-ish light reflecting on the cards. It's a heck weird combination that made my eyes all trippy.
Why do I have a night light? Childhood habit. Feels safer. The dark is scary when you sleep alone ok? STOP JUDGING ME. At least I sleep alone. F o r e v e r a l o n e : ( I need a sleeping buddy. Blegh.
I screwed up December so bad. Well, by my standards. I think I screwed up 3 cards. Optimistically, 3/366 is pretty good.
I screwed them up because I was getting lazy, sidetracked and started daydreaming. Though it's hardly daydreaming when it's everybody else's sleeptime. I think that was a sign for me to go to bed. But I decided to be stubborn and blog because I wanted to get it done. And to brag. And to show off my awesome witty thoughts and whatnot. Okay, I think I might have a problem with narcissism...
I read numbers in my head weirdly. It was like "oh one - nine" "one oh" "eleven". Once, I even alternated and mentally counted "zero one - nine". Variety is good.
I need a cute box for my calendar. And to fill in the entries up until today.

Other random thoughts:

I think I'm pure awesomeness.
I am hungry.
I should go sleep.
Oh! I have been completing my Project 366 very diligently (hooray! Standing ovation?) but have been lazy to upload thus far. But I've been doing them. Will come back and edit them in woo!
Since I've done one craft project, I am closer to my accomplishing one of my yearly goal.
I might do one of those random about me, factoid, thingymabobs when I'm bored.
I viewed the damn post and it did not have bullet points. I like my bullet points. Having to edit this for bullet points. They better turn up soon. Edited it to become numbered. Meh.
Which reminds me, I've become increasingly aware of my obsessiveness. Firstly noticed when watching Friends, where Rachel calls Ross obsessive. I obsess (not in that creepy stalkerish way) but in a compulsive, attention-span issue way where I obsess over it, then neglect it the next second. I don't know why I do this, but if it is some kind of mental problem please let's not mention it because ignorance is bliss. And I already am a bit of a hypochondriac, so let's not encourage such tendencies.

Conversations between strangers & other musings

2012-02-07T08:01:00.001-08:00

I've always had a strange feeling about mornings. I remember those days when I had to travel to high school, in the early hours of the day. Peaceful bus rides, with the silent yet polite acknowledgement between the bus driver and I; music playing through my earphones, staring out into space. Sitting, usually alone, at the train stations randomly daydreaming and thinking. Mornings were when my head and body were dazed and flailing, yet my thoughts would be so clear. There was always a cool, refreshing mistiness about mornings. Another thing I absolutely adore about mornings are that they are so reminiscent of a breezy winter's day. Fresh air is always invigorating, and clears my mind. Anyhow, that morning was a wonderful chilly morning as I embarked on my journey out of the house. It was the first in a very very long time that I had left the house at 6-something. A feat that I had to stay up all night to achieve (if I slept, I would be in bed till dawn). So walking my way to the bus stop, I see this lady. I take note of her briefly, as I take note of all other commuters at my bus stop in the morning. However, she was in the mood to talk.

It was somewhat an intriguing encounter actually. She noted that she remembered me from years back, when I was still in high school. It's interesting because I hardly think about how other commuters or people I pass by randomly would think of me or whether I would leave a strong enough impression that they will remember me. I guess, it's partly inevitable considering I'm petite and all, but I've always kept to myself when commuting unless with friends, where I tend to turn into the typical high school girl/uni conversationalist... whereby if this does happen, it will probably shatter all those images of me being the quiet, reclusive teenager. I don't know, it's never been so much so that I put on a show, it's just I'm a different person when I'm with my friends and when I'm alone. I suppose I love being around my friends where I can freely talk and express myself, which usually means a bunch of random, inarticulate thoughts just leave my brain and releases itself through my mouth making me sound like some typical teenage idiot. However, when I'm alone, it's peaceful and I just like losing myself in my thoughts, detaching myself from "the outside world" (I hope this doesn't make me come across as having some kind of mental problem), to observe others, and sometimes to simply daydream. There is just one other thing, there is this ... amazement I have with public transport and the nature of human interaction on it. I mean, we come across so many people on buses and trains, and in a way, it ties our lives together, yet we're all strangers. What we do, and how they perceive us, don't really affect us on a day to day basis. You know how they say loneliness is being in a room full of people and still feeling out of place? Well, it's the opposite for me. I can sit in a carriage full of other strangers, and I'll just feel at peace, restful. I don't know, I actually like going on public transport alone (bar those "oh so wild" night outs where safety > daydreaming).

Anyways, this lady kept calling me a "good girl" when we exchanged details regarding my education and how I've been in general. Then she went on to tell me about her life (not like in the typical movie where she starts from her younger years and tells me of all these wonderful, crazy experiences that inspires me to go on some epic adventure to find myself, unfortunately). She told me about her three sons (shame on me, but I daydream a little about how if by some twist of fate, she and I became close and she introduced me to her sons and we hit it off and cue happily ever after. I know. All this in like a micro second. And again, shame on me and my imagination. In my defence, they were around my age.) Continuing on, she mentioned that she recently had a heart attack from all the stress in her life. Yet, here she was, on her way to work at 7 in the morning. She told me that even though she had the heart attack, she didn't like to just stay at home and do nothing. She liked to work sometimes, keep herself busy and productive. For some reason, it led me to talk about how much society has changed that it has allowed women to have their own career instead of being forced into a life of domesticity (a part of me here, was eager to turn this rare encounter into something philosophical and life defining; whereas she was more eager to just chatter away while waiting for the bus I gathered). She agreed, then went on to tell me more about her heart attack. It really made me realise though, that life passes us by. Every single day, things just happen, we live and breathe and eat and sleep then the next day comes. Life is supposedly pretty simple. However, we complicate it so much that we bring so much stress onto ourselves. I guess, what I'm coming to terms with is that I still have another 50, 60 years ahead of me. If I get into the habit of overworrying and stressing now, that's another 50, 60 years of worrying and stressing myself over something that won't matter in 50, 60 years. I should learn to live in the moment, stress less and accept failure. I mean, sure it'd be nice to graduate and have a wonderful job lined up for me. But how many people actually have that? If I was really part of the lucky few, then magnificent. But chances are, I will have to work my way up the ladder, or just do something, anything, productive and make a living.

There were other musings, but I started this post probably two nights before. I left it there until now. Horrible of me but it's because I was crafting! So I was being productive, woo me! And for organisation's sake, I have to start another blog post to talk about that because I have a bunch to recap on.

A random daydream, okay this is stupid and it's all because I watch too many dramas, but it is sooo strangely romantic when two guys sit you down and ask you to choose between them hehe.

Bucket List (part 1)

2012-02-05T08:21:00.003-08:00

I randomly came across the 43 Things compilation book, and I've decided to record and look at some of the things people want to do, that I want to do too! And then record it here! Yes, by now you might pick up that I'm either very ambitious and/or that I'm a big fat daydreamer ><"

So here goes:

Admit when I'm lying to myself
Figure out what makes me truly happy
Believe in myself
Identify my strengths
Affirm myself daily
Figure out why I procrastinate
Take 365 days of self portraits
Come to terms with my past
Come to terms with growing older
Love myself
Be proud of myself
Understand why I do what I do
Accept myself
Figure out what motivates me
Understand the world around me
Read all my old journals in chronological order

Craft projects line up

2012-02-02T09:20:00.003-08:00

Went to Lincraft today with a friend, and came home with a bunch of goodies and inspiration! So, in line with my 12 by 12 to complete four crafts projects here are some that I'm planning to do and some random skills-learning/experimenting to get myself there. (a/n: OH MAN, I just saw this "Compose" thing here. Sigh, facepalm. But thank gosh, was trying to find bulletpoints hehe ^_^)

Crafts to do:

1. Finish off DIY Calendar Journal. Soon.

Buy paper cutting set
Cut paper into decided size
Stamp dates
Decorate with screw punch or pens or stamps or paint
Find a cute box

2.DIY Cushions:

Experiment with sewing random & squiggly lines and shapes using a template on spare fabric
Using a stencil and fabric marker on spare fabric
Work out bedroom decor and scheme, to decide how to decorate/select colours the cushions
Buy the inserts and fabric and then get going!

3. Glitter paper cut outs - to decorate curtains when setting up lanterns + photo hanging / photo clothesline display

Fix up curtains
Set up lanterns
Set up clotheslines
Find pretty paper, or paint, or print them
Get templates
Cut out paper
Add glitter
Hole punch
Hang!

4.Wood photo transfer customised Jenga

Buy new Jenga set or find pieces of wood from crafts stores to make
Buy wood transfer materials (gel, Mod Podge etc)
Select photos or designs
Transfer and play!

NTS: Transfer, fix and upload Project 366 photos! Work on Photobook & past photos for compilation post!

Working overseas?

2012-02-02T08:46:00.005-08:00

After reading this article, I realised that I've always had this keen interest in working and livng overseas (for a couple of years, not permanently). I've wanted to do so since, well, Year 9 or 10 by memory. I remember I wanted to move to London to work, because they'd speak English and the weather would be cooler and wetter - something I prefer over Aussie summer (though maybe this year's summer is trying to tempt me to stay?). I guess, that 'dream' was put on the backburner when I got into a relationship where it seemed hard to be away from each other for a month when I went overseas, let alone years. I guess, part of me kept reasoning that when I got to that age, we could go together. But that would be unreasonably selfish of me wouldn't it? Expecting someone I love to just pack, then leave their family and friends behind for a couple of years. And what, have only me? Imagine the pressure that would inflict on the relationship, considering that we'd both be working our asses off, living (and picking up after each other!) together, and we'd only have each other - and well, whoever we befriend there. But what if we struggled to befriend people? What if we were homesick? Then what? I guess it was possible to re-pack our bags and hop on the plane home. But with so much uncertainty, would it be fair of me to expect someone else to be able to explore the world like that, simply based on the fact that "they love me"? I don't know. It wasn't ever a realistic, or immediate, threat honestly. Anyhow, I digress. I guess what I'm saying is that now, I can think about the possibility of working overseas without thinking of all the strains it'll cause on my relationship. I can focus on deciding whether it's something I really wanted to do (leaning towards yes, considering this article!) and whether I can leave my family and friends behind and just start a new life I guess. Another thing is, I'm not at that dark point in my life anymore - like I used to be, when I dreamed of escaping Australia and escaping what surrounded me. I'm much more comfortable with who I am, who my friends are, and what I enjoy and want in life. So the question remains whether I want to even move, and if so, what are my reasons for it? That's a tough question, but one I'll hope to come back to later in the year. I mean, it's not like I even got an offer or anything, it's just a possible goal I can chase. And if it turns out to be one I wanted to chase, one I'll have to research into and try to make possible. Yes, it's all very tentative and wishy washy. Anyways, it's still a few years away so I should probably focus on studying before I have all these high hopes.

On a side note, I've always wanted to visit Netherlands (NOT for the legal marijuana, mind you!) because it sounds so like a cool place. Honestly though, I know nothing of the place and should look into much more carefully before I spend thousands getting there and all. And lookie, if I work there it'd only be 1378 hrs a year. Which sounds like a lot.... Which means, if I worked in Australia.. I'd be working heaps more. Damn. Workaholic culture, I curse you! Man, that means if I work overseas, then c
ome back to work in Australia, I would resort to smashing my head on a table or something... Sounds pleasant.

12 by 12

2012-01-31T06:41:00.000-08:00

Being inspired by Wit & Whistle , and her 12 by 12, as well as her DIY Calendar Journal, I decided to create my own. Except I wanted to combine the two, design-wise. So here goes, these are my 12 by 12 monthly dividers. They're not in order of have to complete by date, not really. I mean, some thought went behind their positioning, but I won't stress myself out with completion deadlines. Note, that photos are not my own but are simply stock photos I found. So credit goes out to original photographers! I only played around with the photos on Photoshop to create these.

Yes, I'm beginning my 12 by 12 with February. Why? As I've said, I decided to myself that instead of having the conventional New Years Resolution + beginning everything from Jan 1st, I'd do it on my birthday. This gives me a month of slacking off, which I've been doing! But apart from that, all that emotional jazz got in the way (and I didn't discover W&W till mid Jan anyways. So it all works out I guess. I mean, it does give me something to look forward to on my birthday!

So learning photography is something I would like to start, considering I am on break still. Hopefully, I can at least pick up the basics, so I don't feel discouraged and give it up. I mean, honestly, I spent a bunch on even getting started so to give up will be utterly disappointing. As a side note, I really should've included learning to drive/getting my P's as part of my 12 by 12, by that didn't really rate on my radar when doing these because I honestly have no passion for driving.

Getting healthy is something I've been mentally begging myself to start on. I'm not a very consistent person with fitness. Strangely, I've once been described as a very consistent person. Anyhow, I've started with swimming and I've been to the gym twice. I plan on doing it more. What people say about exercising releasing endorphins, making you happier (well, rather than happy, I'd say, self-satisfied or somewhat accomplished) holds true. So, after my monthly membership runs out, I'd hopefully find a cheap gym to sign up to.

Learning to swim.. Working on that! I've already gotten the motions correct. Well, considering I'm a self-taught 'swimmer', I'm assuming that I'm correct given that I move at all. Relied a lot on my junior high school swimming lessons (except I can't recall how to back float... That or I gained weight T_T). Now, I'm trying to teach myself to breathe underwater. I bought nose plugs to see if that'd help. Struggled with how to wear them (blonde moment, sitting at the pools trying to stuff that piece of wire on my nose.. It looks uncomplicated, but it's damned hard to figure out if the thing doesn't fit well on my nose!) and when I did get it right, it seriously kept slipping off. Making me very depressed (they costed $8, and didn't work well!) So, I looked online for some "swimming drills" and will work on them later. Phew. Hopefully it helps me and I can swim, taking more than two breaths (the most I can do so far). My problem has been that every time feel like I need to gasp for air, my natural reflex is to land my feet.

Lookbook - the reason I would like to start a lookbook is simply because I think it would be fun to document my personal style over the years. Admittedly, I'm slightly overwhelming myself with all these personal social networking things (tumblr, blogspot, facebook and lookbook? DAYUM GIRL!) But no, if anything I will post on here and pretend that counts. Or be unlazy and post on lookbook once in a while. That workds too, hehehe.

Yes, this. I used to pride myself on owning all of Vic's dramas. I can't say that anymore because DVDs got lost and mum's friends probably fell in love with Vic and didn't want to give them back :( So, I will re-stalk Vic. Movies I need to watch include Tea Fight, Sleepless Fashion and the newly released Perfect Two. Dramas include Jin Da Bin, Sweet Relationship, Wish to see you again, Meteor Garden 2, and Prince Taro (if I can even find it!). Also, I want to re-watch Mars because it was so goddamn hot, and he was so damn irresistible in it.

Volunteering or interning is another thing I want to do. I guess, it would be nice to get my foot in the door with my career, considering my grades haven't been the best. With volunteering, I guess I really would like to help others and work towards a worthy cause. So I want to complete either one, if not combine it. Considering that my priority would be to get a paid internship, if not I'll do a volunteer position simply because it'd combine my two wants well.

Crafting is something I've always loved, but never had time or conviction to do. So hopefully by putting this on my 12 by 12, I'd actually do it. I mean, I can even include the DIY Calendar Journal as one of them done! Considering I mostly ogle, and don't need that many crafty things, I hope this is a realistic aim.

I've been mentally chiding myself and feeling uber guilty when I walk by those people who ask for donations. So, hopefully I will donate more, even if it's a little it can go a long way. If I have the opportunity, I will try to donate a large chunk.

Oooh, just discovered that I can multi-upload images. But apparently, they upload in the reverse/backwards order. Noted. This will come in handy when I actually have photoshoots to post up. The reason I want to do this is because this is what I keep envisioning. There was a personal project I wanted to complete, but that looks unlikely at the moment. So I will look for other photoshoots to play with, and just hopefully, keep photographing.

Yes, reading has always been one of my favourite hobbies and loves since I was a kid. Admittedly, I haven't read for a while. But I decided to get back into it. I'm in the middle of a book right now. So that's good. I guess I can count two, but the other one is more of a guide. But yes, it seems like this is an achievable goal. Though when uni starts, I might become desperate and count uni textbooks as a book. Hope not, because that might be demeaning towards my love for books. Ooh, I want to read a biography as well. So add that to the list as well.

And, finally, completing my project 365/366. It's a leap year. Yes, this is because I'm always so lazy and inconsistent. So I really want to do this. Maybe I will be delayed with the whole uploading thing (life and uni beckons), but with the actual photographing I hope I will stick to it.

12:41am on my birthday

2012-01-31T05:41:00.001-08:00

Today I turn 19. It's not an especially important age for many, but this birthday marks several 'milestones' for me. I've recently gone through some emotional turmoil, and I kept telling myself (or excusing myself) that beginning on my birthday, I will work towards improving myself, my life and being more proactive. I'm a conditioned procrastinator, but a dreamer by heart.

I've many resolutions for this year, personal goals and dreams that I would like to achieve. But, I'm at a point (both emotionally and mentally) where I'm afraid. Yet, I know that I don't want to have lived my life simply "existing", I'd rather "experience". So hopefully, I will stay proactive with my goals and strive to achieve them.

With a growing interest in photography, I decided to create this blog to capture my year in photos with a Project 366. By the end of the year, hopefully I've grown as a person and I'm at a better 'place' emotionally.